3.21.2006
wads e fastest n most efficient way to commit suiside?dats wad a few of us n 1 of e staff nurse was dicussing in e tea room todae. cos its lyk in our ward dere's alot of pt admitted cos of DO (drug overdose). fer reasons lyk bf dumped dem n stuffs lidat. u noe. its so dumb. den another wan she took 80-90 tablets. 80-90 can! its so much. dunno fer wad sia. but tis not cos of bf la. dunno e cos oso.
one of e pt ate paracetamol to commit suiside. den whn we r hafing role call. dey was lyk. diaos. wan die go tiao lou (jump floor) la. eat wad paracetomol. i was lyk huh. y?
den aft dat whn we were in e tea rm. e staff nurse said dat paracetomol will oni cause harm to ur liver. u will not die of it. so yea. ppl. nxt tym if u wanna commit suiside don take paracetomol. it wun work ok. try something betta.
so bei shan was lyk.
bei shan: last tym she oso eat parcetomol wan ar? *cos tis was e pt's 3rd attempt to commit suiside*
staff nurse: most probably.
bei shan: haiyos. y so toopid. 1st attempt - paracetomol. failed. 2nd attempt same thing, failed. 3rd attempt stil do e same thing? fail liao stil wan carry on w e same med. cant she b cleverer n change other tactics of commiting suiside.
*laughs frm everyone in e tea rm la*
staff nurse: aiya, dey tis kind of ppl oni wan to seek attention. u think dey reali wan to die meh.
bei shan n me : if we wan to die oso don wan to jump floor. die liao wil b so ugly. *i was thinkiing ya. mayb a limb wil fly off. or mayb even a missing head or something. lols.
bei shan: if i wan to commit suiside i think i wil open e gas n die inside. e smell not bad. i quite lyk it.
me: aiya, mus wil jux sit in e car n let carbon monxide do e job. stil got air con to blow b4 u die leh. den die liao oso pretty. drink detergent la can die anot ar?
staff nurse: not necessary wan la. bleach oso wun kill. wil jux burn ur esophagus n stomach. wan die jiu eat dose bp med. sure die wan. once e bp goes down drastically. e doc oso cant do anything.
den we went off to work alreadi la.
den i was thinking ya lo. kind of toopid. n den heard frm e other student nurse dat all her 3 attempts oso cos of bf. diaos. my 1st reaction was guys sux man. toopig guys. wonder wad dey do to make her end up int is stage man. n y e ger so toopid attempted suiside thrice cos of a guy. but dey said mayb diff guy leh. oso true.
i think if i was her, i wun ever wan to go into relationship again ba. aft being hurt so much. n now its e 3rd tym. stil can take it orh. i think mayb dat marks e end of hafing relationship fer me. but not death la. its kind of toopid.
dieing fer someone who don even gif a damn of whether u exsisted anot is not worth it at all la. dumb dumb dumb. jux cry all u wan n 4get bout it huh.
actuali i've got tis kind of tots b4 whn i was in sec sch. mayb too stress n depress. but jux think of wan to doe as in leaving e toopid world. dat kind of thing. but neva think of plans n anything lidat. mild depression mayb. lols.
back den, mayb stil childish la huh. aniwae, think im more mature now la. dieing is neva a way to solve prob. dere's oways a way out. ware dere's a will dere's a way. even if dere isnt. its stil not e end of e world.