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dance today was WOW.
ok it seems lyk everytym dance was wow.
hahaha.

anw i lyk carol's class.
its tiring but easy to catch up w.
n its a sweating all out class.

im quitting studio wu alr.
reason being its too much of e new class thingy.
n dere isnt room for competitions n performace.
so most prob joining o school.
or did i mention dat b4 alr?

was stuck at jp for lyk 2 hrs b4 i actually go home.
it was raining lyk mad la.
n im tired frm all e training in earlier on.

actions speaks louder than words u noe.
no matter how hard e trying seems to b.
dere's stil a barrier.
mayb its 2 diff world kind of thingy.
n i really don understand a single bit of it.

Labels: casual

IMH attachment is finally over.
but somehow im starting to miss it alr.
names of patients stil lingers in my head.

aft all, tis posting wasnt as bad as i previously tot it was la.
it was stil an enriching n good learning experience.
n e best thing is its super slack over dere.
out of all my attachment, tis is e most slack wan la.

cant wait for KKH attachment nxt wk.
motivation frm food helps alot huh.
haha.

parents going genting for 3 days.
meaning i haf to go to work myself.
sobs.
nvm, im gonna b independent la huh. (:

haf u all wondered y wad we oways tot of cant b e same as reality?
ok mayb it can.
but its stil not exactly e same.

whneva i look at those tv programs.
how wonderful things oways seems to work out despite those worst times dey had.
how couples oways look so extremely sweet in tvs.
i oways tot y it culdnt b e same in life?

i feel super isolated w everybody.
its lesser chats.
its lesser communications.
its lesser +ve tots.
its more lonely nites.
its more envy.
its more question marks.

Labels: casual

we were walking back frm e forensic ward jus now n my phone rang.
papa called n said he's waiting for me at e lobby.
n u noe wad.
i felt so XING FU.

papa mention in e morn dat if he by pass IMH, he wil cum over to fetch me.
but i neva expected him to really come.
i mean he needs to work u see.
n he fetch me home n went out to work again.
its lyk a surprise n something frm e heart kind of thing to me.

imagine.
aft a whole day of work.
someone dear to u is here to fetch u.
e feeling is superb.
seriously, nth beats e love frm ur own parents.

i reach home at lyk b4 4pm whn i end work at 3plus.
if i were to go home myself im probably stil stuck somewhere in e mrt.
n black clouds r starting to form in e sky.
so u can see how one such small action makes e other feel so different.

a fren of mine mention dat his parents neva fetch him to n frm sch since he was in kindergarden.
its really sad la.
i can empathize w him.
but sometimes many things aint within our control.

however i believe dat nth beats e love frm ur parents.
dey r e ones who wil b dere for u in all times of need.
lyk jus now in e forensic ward.
e ward staff mention dat e patient stayed dere for more than 7 yrs alr.
starting, his wife came to visit him every visiting days avaliable.
but aft 7 yrs, she stopped.
n she found her own life outside.
away frm him.
but his mum stil comes regularly to see him despite e mistake dat he has made in life.
she's stil oways dere for him.

some parents haf diff approach.
dey love u in a diff manner.
sometimes we jus fail to see it.
don realise it too late for life is short.

for some, mayb its really a fact dat u will neva get to experience tis kind of situation.
but take things easy.
i mean not all things goes e way we wan dem to isnt it.
take things as it is n move on.

mayb whn nxt tym u haf a family urself.
gif dem e best.
gif dem wad u failed to receive frm ur parents.
let ur child b appreciate of u in e future.
it doesnt mean dat ur parents don provide u w such love, den u cant provide ur child dat love.
in fact, go e extra mile.
make dem feel fortunate.
its easy saying yet so hard to accomplish.
but nth is impossible.
haf a goal n work towards it.

now, i really feel great to b in a complete n happy family.
n im happy. (:
cherish everything ard u.
don come to regret.

its jus my personal views la.
tho somehow it may not make sense to some.
or at point of tym i myself oso dunno wad im saying.
but stil. yep. =D

Labels: personal tots

breathe.
im feeling better alr.
thnks for ppl who haf shown concern. =)

im here to update bout saturday!
had pre celebration for xin's bdae.
n it was meant to b a surprise.

met up w dar dar at bl.
den went westmall to get cake.
mit ducky at clementi.
n off marina square we went.

went kbox n decorated e place.
i blew e 1st balloon oni jiu BURST la.
somemore its blow halfway den burst.
eeeeks.
den i entertain dem by singing cos i don wan to touch those balloons.

dar w e balloon in her mouth.

balloons!

whn its tym.
dar went to mit xin n nerd.
while me n ducky stay in kbox to get ready for e surprise.
ducky suddenly wan to wee wee la.
so we were thinking wun so suay de.
but end up dey really came whn ducky went to e ladies.

b4 i culd finish lighting e candles dey alr came in.
not much of a surprise.
but stil, hope xin likes it.

bdae cake!

xin posing w her cake.

cutting of cake.

dar n xin singing. lalala~

make a wish~

squarting n choosing songs`

after kbox we went FINS to eat.
e food dere so-so oni.
actually i don think i wan to go dere again.
boo!

dar, xin n nerd de seafood bake rice.

me n ducky de fish n chips.

nerd n xin.

dar n xin.

xin, nerd, dar.

dar, me, xin.

me n dar, e kiddos!

us w nerd fav hand sign.

ducky n xin.

xin n me outside of boy's toilet.

had ice cream aft dat.
really yummy.
3 flavours.
i share w dar.
xin n nerd share.
den ducky eat 1 herself.

xin n nerd de ice cream.

me n dar de ice cream.

ducky's ice cream.

den we head down to esplanade roof top.
been some tym since i went dere.
very got feel.
hahaha.
we chat n took many pics dere.

durian!

FD @ e esplanade.

nerd n xin.

dar n xin.

me n xin.

quack quack.

grp pic.

nxt was e merlion place.
took many artistic pics la.
very very funny.
was laughing all e way.
n so pai seh lo.
cos many ppl looking at us.

merlion!

ahh. drink water frm e merlion.

welcome to e merlion place. =D

aiming not zhun de.

was suppose to follow e boat. hahaha.

double twist.

i lyk it whn its near e sea.
e sea breeze makes me feel good.

n ta-da!
home sweet home.

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its hard to control.
many things aint within our wishes.
but im stil hanging on for i dunno wad reasons.
hopefully im not making a wrong choice.
its affecting me damn lot.

Labels: casual

i've been breaking down again n again.
im not a strong ger afterall.
e feeling is terrible.

sometimes trying too hard wun help.

sobs. =(

Labels: sadness

pm shift is so much better than am shift.
i get to sleep more in e pm shift b4 heading to work.
i dunno y but somehow tym passes faster in e pm shift.
most importantly we don get to see e CF lesser in e pm shift.

i really bth dat CF alr lo.
e sight of her really dampens my mood la.
TSKKKKKKK.
but i don haf a choice, do i?

all students don lyk her.
staff dere prefer other CF over her.
patients complain to us bout her.
so u can imagine how bad she is and how bad we r suffering?
its jus damn suay to get her as a CF la.

attachment is alr bad.
w tis kind of CF it makes it even worst.

but anw.
today e patients were quite participative.
n dere's lyk board games, art n craft, mahjong n yoga sessions.
zhong dian is dere's no CF.
she oni came at 3pm n NAG for lyk mayb 20mins?

n dere's food in e pm shift eh.
zhu cao.
i think its much better than e ones in am shift.
but too bad i got less pm shift than am shift.

6 more days to go.

Labels: attachment

im here to declare BIG BIG dat i don lyk IMH posting.

1. IMH is damn freaking far. luckily daddy is fetching me to work for morn shift n bacn home on nite shift. it makes alot of diff n i really appreciate. (: cos journey is close to 2 hrs n it really kills. bus to hougang mrt. NEL train to outram. east west train to boon lay. n finally bus back home.

2. cos of tis posting im lacking of my beauty sleep n i cant take it anymore. i barely sleep everyday. n morn shift n afternoon shift lyk doesnt make any diff tho afternoon shift starts at 1pm cos travelling tym took up a huge part.

3. e food at IMH sux big tym. all e food dere cant make it. i dunno how e staff dere survive working w/o nice food at least for motivation to work. n dey close at lyk 4pm. so whn its afternoon shift dere wun b food. damn sad.

4. ppl over at e ward r scary. esp on e 1st day. im posted to male ward. n dey jus come crowding ard us. n pointing at whose pretty n asking for names. n dey approach u n tok non stop.

5. i have patients asking me for num n wanting to b my fren. n to think dat im alone in a rm doing some test w him. it really scare e hell out of me. not oni dat dere's 1 who kip 'following' me n talking to me. frens told me to hide n he really jus walk over n walk away. but whn im dere, he wil cum over n tok to me.

6. e CF taking us is expecting dat we know every single thing n wan ans dats only in her mind. the ans dat r in her mind r e correct ones. n i think dat she thinks she's very pro in everything. she nags damn lot. n i really don lyk it. n i don see y i nid to oni b a psychology student to help e psychologist. n dat nursing students haf to do nursing stuffs n stay away frm psychology stuffs cos its not within e job scope. lyk wadeva.

7. e appearance of IMH looks damn nice. as if lyk a resort. but inside, the wards r quite i dunno how i shld describe it. but definately not wad i expected. its stuffy n everywhere is locked. if anything happens, i think i wil die dere.

8. dere's no ngee ann lecturers over dere for us. n i felt so uneasy. i noe its tym to b independent. but its a new environment. n i feel so noob over dere dat i wanna hide myself at times.

9. i feel uncomfortable w all e starings frm e ppl dere. its not a good feeling. it makes me haf more phobias towards IMH, seriously.

10. i really really don lyk tis posting. i think i wil die if i haf to stay dere any longer. i cant wait for KK posting to come. n i really cant wait to count down. its lyk 7 more days. hurry!!

Labels: attachment

crying n celebration of bdae doesnt match.
crying n fully packed train doesnt match.
crying n outside shopping mall doesnt match.
crying n bus journey doesnt match.
finally crying n home matches.

i tried all hard to fight back tears.
but in e end i stil teared.
im so damn sad.
super duper ultra sad.

somebody pls kill me for my stupidity + carelessness.
somebody pls wake me up.
somebody pls tel me wad to do.
somebody pls save me.

i seriously don wanna lose dat thing dat i might me losing right now.
i hate tis feeling to e core.
i don wan to noe e outcome.
i really don.

pls take anything u wan.
but not my future.
not my education future.
not my hard saved assets dat i have.
anything but dat.

not even millions amt of chocs can cheer me up.
not even encouraging words can do some help.
not even comforting things make a change.
im so helpless.
seriously helpless.

sob. =(

Labels: sadness

thurs was zoo day.
rchn brought kids n elderly frm e salvation army to e ZOO.
we were each assigned to one kid/elderly.
im w ying wen, pri 5.
she's one cute little ger la.

n all e way thru out e zoo trip me, cam n chunhui were tgt.
we lost e rest of e ppl la.
n we walk on our own.
it might b less fun cos fewer ppl.
but i stil enjoyed myself being amazed at all those animals. (:

whn e kids n elderly left, we continued to stay in e zoo.
hoping to see more animals dat we missed out.
but sadly, it rain soon aft.
n we're all wet la.
but i LOVE e rain.
haha.

flamingo. FD wil laugh looking at tis. dey noe y huh. hahaha.

tis monkey super cute la. he use e towel kip covering his face. den ltr put it on his head.

elephants! i wanna ride on it some day. (:

sea lion. super clever n well-trained.

artistic leh. hahaha.

baboons! e backside damn red lo. i cant help but laugh. =X

another pic of baboons!

white tiger which e kids kept nagging us to bring dem to see.

some kind of PIG. lol.

tis bear is super cute la. rest his hands on e rock n kip looking at us.

otter. n we saw otter's fight. heh heh.

skinnest camel seen.

grp pic 1.

grp pic 2.

aft which head to cck for dinner.
n head down back to ps for movie.
storm e yard.
not too bad.
but if u're those dat dislike noisy environment den u better don watch.

e show was at 945pm.
so everyone assumed dat dere's transport home ltr la.
n lyn sae no ppl wil dance for 2hrs de.
n tada!
e show oni end at 12plus lo.
n dere's totally no transport home alr.

lyn got jh to fetch n longbang kel home oso.
bren got dad to fetch n longbang milty home oso.
ym, cam, me n zb took cab over to zb's aunt hse to get e car.
n zb drove us home.
how nice of him huh. (:

n we had supper b4 heading home.
dat toopid zb claimed dat im super luo suo whn i told him e direction.
hahaha.
n cam stayed over at my place dat nite.
we browsed thru frendster til 530am in e morn b4 slping la.
really kpo man.
hahaha.

cam woke me up n says she got to go back to mysia.
so all plans of swimming, exercising, doing smth for dem was cancelled off.
went over opp to eat w mum, bro n aunt.
den went home n slept til evening tym.

n sat was dance!
we actually went to e wrong class e 2nd hr la.
but we jus danced anyway.
head town w rabian n geok boon whole waiting for min, nette n ducky to mit me.

in between saw lee khim n thiam boon.
its been real long. at least lyk 2 yrs?
n i saw ting hui oso.
heh heh.

meet dem den me n ducky had pastamania cos i complained dat i was hungry.
walked ard hereen n cine.
den head down to ms.
n we had changing appetite for dinner.
got comfortable sofa n pillow lo.
n im full to e max la.
all e fats burn during dance gone down e drain la.
tsk.

n ducky ate wads left over frm us.
she's a big eater la.
n i dunno y she's so scare of me.
hahaha.

den we took lots of artistic pic.
mostly i taking cos only i entertain dar dar.
hahaha.
but i love those pics!

heavenly choc drink. yummy!

some cookies n cream drink.

nette n my cheese e chicken. yummylicious lo. stil got mango wan leh. hahaha.

dar n ducky's i dunno wad isit cal. but v nice oso. (:

oh ! ketchup falling on my head.

me n ducky w eeyore dat dar bought for her student.

me n my nachos w cheese n mango!

hide hide hide! =D

i dunno wads tis but dar said its artistic. hahaha.

scoop me up?

nette w her fav hand pose.

let nette get wet!

ketchup n chilli for sales.

BIG bear. small ducky.

scissors paper stone.

dey bully me!! hahaha.

den dey acc me to suntec to mit up w zb, bren, lyn, ym n ch.
too bad culdnt join dem in e clebration earlier on la.
dey went mid down movie but i jus sat down n crap b4 heading home.

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its attachment tml.
n im stil not ready for it.
tho im really looking forward.
but again.
dist n lack off slping tym issues make me minus e look 4ward feel.

zb n cq is flying off tml.
cant send dem off.
damn sad lo.
hais.
hope dey haf a safe journey yea.
n come back soon!

Labels: casual